Runner and Pacer Dialogue Decoded

RUNNER AND PACER DIALOGUE DECODED

Guest blog: Gia Madole

                Have you ever heard a runner and pacer talking, or been the pacer or runner, especially at the end of a hundo and wondered what they really meant? Following is an exclusive guide to decoding a pacer’s and a runner’s conversation.

At the Aid Station - Pacer Pick Up


Pacer “You look great, let me refill your water and we will get going.”

Translation – You look like crap. I’ve seen corpses look better than you!

Runner “Thanks, I’m just going to sit for a min.”

Translation – I feel like I am dying. Can you just shoot me and put me out of my misery?

Pacer “Ok we need to go now.”

Translation – Get your butt up, I’ve been waiting to run all day and you’re just sitting there.

Runner “Ok I am going.”

Translation – Are you sure you can’t just shoot me?


A little further down the trail

Pacer “Where would you like me to run?”

Translation – Please say in front, please say in front, I really want to run.

Runner “I don’t care, I guess in front.”

Translation – Maybe if you run in front I can hook a rope to you and you can drag me. That’s legal right?


A mile later….

Runner “Maybe…. run beside me?”

Translation – Are you freaking kidding me!! There is no way I can go that fast I can’t even feel my legs!!

Pacer “OK”

Translation – Can I get a cattle prod and run behind you then?

Runner “Sorry I am running so slowly.”

Translation – I really do feel bad you have to run so slow, but I really am happy you are here with me”

Pacer “Don’t worry this is a great pace. You have a lot of miles on your legs today”

Translation – This is horribly slow, my grandmother with a walker goes faster than this!

Pacer “I think the next girl is about an hour behind you.”

Translation – I know the next girl is 5+ hours behind but she is real competitive, maybe this will help?

Runner – No comment

Translation – S*@! Ok… I found a new gear.

Pacer – No comment

Translation - YES!!! We are running!

Runner “I have to puke.”

Translation – Good thing you are on the other side of me this is going everywhere.

Pacer “Maybe ginger ale at the next aid station will help?”

Translation – If you would learn to puke as you run it would really save time.

Runner “Do you see those eyes in the woods?”

Translation – Maybe whatever it is will come and snatch me and put me out of my misery.

Pacer – “What eyes? You’re imagining them. Oh that… it’s just a frog, keep moving.”

Translation – Yup there are about 20 sets of wild animal eyes staring at us. The plus side is I can run faster than you right now so you will be diner not me.

Runner “I really don’t care about a stupid buckle!”

Translation – I really do want that buckle but I also want to stop.

Pacer “Yes you do turn around and keep moving.”

Translation – I am out here all night to help you, you are getting that buckle even if I have to drag you across the finish line!

Runner “When did you turn into the Devil!”

Translation – I hate you, I love you, I hate you, I love you!

Pacer – No comment, laughing inside.

Translation – You think I am the devil now, just wait if you don’t keep moving you will see the real devil come out.

Pacer “We are getting close only a few more miles.”

Translation – Well technically a few can be rounded up so technically 8 miles can be called a few

Runner “Ok”

Translation – Maybe I will survive.


A guy runner passes

Runner “Crap”

Translation – Double crap how is he running so fast! Oh, I just found another gear; no way is another runner going to pass me.  

Pacer – No comment

Translation – YES!! And we are now running!!

Runner “This pace isn’t so bad, why was I not running like this before?”

Translation – Everything in my body hurts and hates me, even my pinky finger!

Pacer “You’re doing great!”

Translation – You really are doing great!

Pacer “I see the lights at the finish line, time to go get your buckle.”

Translation – I’m not going to have to drag you across the line, woo hoo!

Runner – “Yes!”

Translation – Adrenaline is such a wonderful thing!

Runner and Pacer Cross the finish line

Runner “Thank you”

Translation – Thank you Thank you Thank you!!! Even though you turned into the devil for a little bit you helped me so much!

Pacer “Anytime”

Translation – I really did have fun and I am proud of how well you did. Plus it gives me a funny story to tell later.

                The mystery dialogue is now solved. You will no longer have to wonder what a runner or pacer really mean in their conversations.